half-sassed:

Heterosexuality is a couch. Nobody even bats an eye if you keep it in the living room for everyone to see–it’s simply expected. I mean, where the hell else would you keep it? Hidden in a bedroom? No, that would be weird.

Homosexuality is a bed. Having a bed in a public room is considered weird and gross–you’re expected to keep it in private bedroom you close the door to before anyone else comes over. Because even though there are a million and one things someone can do sitting on a bed that aren’t sexual (and plenty of ways to have sex on a couch), the first and foremost thing anyone associates beds with is sex.

Bisexuality is a Western-style futon. Sometimes it functions like a couch, sometimes it functions like a bed, but whichever position it’s in at the moment, it’s still a goddamn futon. People who want to use it as a couch give you shit for not having a real couch; people who want to use it as a bed give you shit for not having a real bed. It’s acceptable in your living room, but only if you make extra certain to put it in couch position and hide the sheets before company comes over. Otherwise, you’d better hide it in a guest room.

Asexuality is a table. No matter how many times you tell people it’s not meant to be sat on, dickheads with no manners will try to park their nasty asses on it anyway.

(via coldsaturn)

vashti-lives:

jordanlhawk:

naamahdarling:

kyraneko:

animatedamerican:

gokuma:

thepreciousthing:

gracielovesjesus:

2015: Man-on-man marriage
2017: Man-on-child marriage
2019: Man-on-dog marriage
2021: Man-on-car marriage
2023: Hopefully the world ends by then tbh

Two consenting adults, be they man and woman, man and man, woman and woman, or any other combination not specified by the above, are now granted the right (as they always should have had) to enter a legally binding contract and obtain all its attached benefits.

Children cannot give consent. Children cannot legally sign contracts. Children cannot get married.

Animals cannot give consent. Animals cannot legally sign contracts. Animals cannot get married.

Optimus Prime is a sentient being and leader of the entire Autobot race and I don’t think you have any place telling him who his people can and cannot marry. If he is okay with Rewind and Chromedome or Astoria and Powerglide then you need to step off.

WELL SAID

It’s very easy to make Gracie’s mistake here if you persist in thinking of marriage as “a man and his chosen marriage object” rather than, you know, “two people choosing to marry each other.”

Says something about how some people view heterosexual marriage.

DING DING DING DING DING we have a winner.

None of these people have ever expressed a worry that dogs will start wanting to marry men, or that houseplants will start wanting to marry cars.

This way of thinking only makes sense if your view of straight marriage depends on “man actively choosing, woman passively chosen” and gay marriage only fits into your worldview as the distortion “man actively choosing wrong thing,” as though it’s a Sesame Street comedy sketch with Mr. Noodle trying to marry a pocket watch by mistake, presumably with his pants on his head.

Interestingly enough, I’ve never heard someone warn us about women wanting to marry anything, either.

thank you for that mental image.  and yes, this is exactly right.  i’ve never seen any anti-marriage assholes talk about what they’re afraid WOMEN will do.

It’s very easy to make Gracie’s mistake here if you persist in thinking of marriage as “a man and his chosen marriage object” rather than, you know, “two people choosing to marry each other.”

This, holy shit, yes. Literally until now I never understood how people couldn’t understand “can’t enter into a legally binding contract” when it came to children, animals, whatever. And now it’s clear as fucking day. And even grosser than I realized.

Yep, so much of the fundamentalist christian world view makes so much more sense when you realize they have no concept of consent.

(via 252an0n)